I don’t know about your parents, but mine send me email forwards. Generally, they’re cute, but not enough to send along. This one from Momma though, it made me laugh out loud in a few instances. It gets a little long, so I took out the ones I found less funny.
I hope you have a good Monday!
NOTES FROM THE EDGE OF LIFE
Dear Noah,
We could have sworn you said the ark wasn’t leaving till 5.
Sincerely,
UnicornsDear Twilight fans,
Please realize that because vampires are dead and have no blood pumping through them,
they can never get an erection. Enjoy fantasizing about that.
Sincerely,
LogicDear Icebergs,
Sorry to hear about the global warming. Karma’s a bitch.
Sincerely,
The TitanicDear America ,
You produced Miley Cyrus.
Bieber is your punishment.
Sincerely,
CanadaDear Yahoo,
I’ve never heard anyone say, “I don’t know, let’s Yahoo! it.” Just saying…
Sincerely,Dear girls who have been dumped,
There are plenty of fish in the sea. Just kidding! They’re all dead.
Sincerely,
BPDear Scissors,
I feel your pain…no one wants to run with me either.
Sincerely,
Sarah PalinDear Ugly People,
You’re welcome.
Sincerely,
AlcoholDear World,
Please stop freaking out about 2012.
Our calendars end there because some Spanish d-bags
invaded our country and we got a little busy ok?
Sincerely,
The MayansDear iPhone,
Please stop spell checking all of my rude words into nice words.
You piece of shut.
Sincerely,
Every iPhone User
That last one is something even the Android users (like myself) lament as well…I’ve had to teach my phone naughty words several times!
I’ve also had to teach my phone naughty words. Even the word hell, which my phone always wanted to change to he’ll. Not really what I was going for.
I don’t like the one about vampires and erections. Not that I’d argue the logic – but if we’re talking about people who have transformed into an undead, immortal being, I really don’t think logic has a place in the conversation.
Personally I think they should come pre-programed with all sorts of curse words. At the very least I shouldn’t have to reteach it every 90 days!
Ok. I’ll give you the vampire logic.
I love this! Will you send it to me? It needs to be shared even more.
Sent. Let me know if it didn’t come through
I love this with every fiber of my being!!!!!!!!!!